Nostalgia :D

Yesterday, my mom was cleaning out our 'art-closet' haha :p A closet with all our paint brushes, paper, paint, ... and lots more of that! She found my drawings and painting from secondary school ! These are the drawings and paintings from when I was like 13 - 14 years old. 

I took a picture from a few works haha, I will share them with you because it's like nostalgia for me ! :D

 The arrow shows something I like about that painting. Even if it's my own painting, I still think, the motion that 'man' is making hilarious! We had to re-make a real painting. I remeber I spend a lot of time cursing about that painting haha. We had to work with sections, and everything had to be in the right section! Damn, like I already said, I cursed a lot! haha

THAT CHIN! hahahahahaha. We had to make a drawing for a campaign against smoking ! But as far as I can remeber,... I was smoking and that time haah, but don't you think it's a pretty scary drawing. They must put that picture on sigaret pack! Especially for the HUGE chin! haha

 

 I don't know what the instructions were with that drawing :p But I kinda still like this one :) In stead of being scary, like a scarecrow should be, I think it's rather sweet and peacefull.

Draw a castle in pencil and paint a background, then put them together.. I guess that was the mission of our teacher at the time. I guess I made a mistake with my paint but was to lazy to make it right, or to start over haha. The castle is 'kinda' ok for a 14 year old? No? Or am I to optimistic?

 <--  another one, another castle (ugly one!! ) but a much better background :D

THAT is what I call a cute dragon :D But then look at that "flower" in the corner? That doesn't even make sense haha.

Again, another campaign against smoking. Kinda funny haha.  

To lazy to finish the other half? Haha, if I cannot make two parts of the face the same, I just draw one side?

That was in my "manga" period. I have hundreds simular drawings!




















 

That one is kinda ok?



























Just a sketch... of a powerfull woman :D

That's a painting from,.. I guess 2 years ago? But I don't know how to finish it so, I'm not touching it anymore :p

One or two year ago I guess. 

 Hands, that was not so easy for me, because I'm not an artist or something. Just when I'm bored :)

    

Haha, Alien eyes? Barbie-doll mouth and haha, beneath my drawing lays my scratch paper and there, if you look closely, you can see 'made in Belgium' haha :D lol

I always draw on scratch paper, because I draw out of boredom haha :p

I made the drawing above again.. I think it's a bit better now :)

Friends

I was planning on going to sleep right now, when something popped into my mind.

I'm thankfull for all the people who have been there for me when I'm having a hard time! I was thinking, what would I do without them? When you're having a hard time you realize ( or afterwards ), how important friends are. Humans are not ment to be alone!

I've sat at home for more than six months, alone and it was driving me crazy! I needed social contact, conversations with other people than my ( lovely ) mother! So, this is just a quick post to thank all of the people who have always been there for me. Even at the time I've just met them, they didn't knew me very wel, but they were there for me. I didn't scare them away with all my crazytalk :)

The last two years I've become closer to certain people, and these people, I want to keep in my life. I've been through alot, "friends" left me, people who I thought were friends actually were talking behind my back, people I was kind to, just needed me for certain things they needed. Well, I'm glad I'm over that! 

I've started over with new people, new friends!


So, now I have these important people, I'd like to hang on to them! It's hard sometimes, busy with school, having a boyfriend, not much time. I hope they understand, but realize, when they need me, I will always be there like they been there for me.


" But, I'll be there for you, when the rain starts to pour. 
I'll be there for you, like I've been there before. 
I'll be there for you, cause you're there for me too"

Friends- Such a great show ♥


I've also noticed, people have some kind of meaning in your life,.. Every single person that's been in your life has a reason they have been there. Some are a lesson and others are a blessing! I have a friend, and I did not know what to do about him. I've tried to kick him out of my life, but for some reason, he keeps crawling back in! Aha, that picture above reminds me of that person. Even if you shut the door, real friends will find a way to get back in. So I did, I let him back in and I'm glad. He's like some kind of special person in my life. Don't ask me why, it's just like that.  Anyhow, glad I have him as a friend. He knows me very well, he's always busy but when I really need him, he's there for me. And a long time ago, I thought I lost that special person.

We lived like a street away from each other, and almost every night, we went outside to the park, smoke some sigarets and have a great chat. When I had to move, to the city, that all just fade away. I tried to keep in touch with him, but for a reason ( I then did not know ) it didn't work out. I thought I lost him and I was so angry about that. And so I wanted to remove him out of my life, I thought, well, if I am that special to you, such a good friend to you, why the hell don't you speak to me anymore?

In a very hard way, I removed him out of my life with an angry letter. I cried and cried about it, but nothing happend. But the first time after months not talking to him, I started to realize I was wrong. I was only seeing one side of the story, mine. So I apologised to him and asked him what exactly happend. Because I was confused. And then, he told me why he didn't answered my text, or didn't had the time to meet me. The boy was in a damn depression! And I was to fucking blind to see that! And again, I cried and cried about that. Feeling so guilty of what I had done to him. He tried to build a wall between us, and not bother me, or anyone with his 'problems', but he didn't talked to me at all. Why did I not see that coming? But, things went positive. We had a great talk, and now, he's still busy with school, but I talk to him more often, just making small talk, but when I meet him, serious talks happen hha. I'm glad he crawled back into my life, without even knowing it haha. Faith?

So, friends are very important to me. They mean the world to me. I've learned from my mistakes and hopefully, I will never make them again!


This short and quick note has become a bit more than short I see haha. Now, bedtime!

Seeya

What is normal?

So, I've noticed my blog has a lot of viewers! I'm just wondering, are you guys all reading this? And why? What is interesting? Or are you all just random people lost in cyberspace. Clicking on my page and than thinking, "oh crap! Wrong page, not wat I was looking for!" Haha

So, I read a quote yesterday :

I don't know if you have ever heard the story when Colombus discoverd America, the Indians didn't 'saw' the ship. I don't know why but this quote reminds me of this story. It's kinda crazy. I don't think it is possible that they really did not saw that ship. It has rather to do with interpretation. They could not interpret it because they had never seen a ship (that big) before. So, I think they actually saw the ship but did not know what it was so did not worry about it. Not worry about it, not set any alarm. Anyway, I'm not that good at history haha. I just thought it was something interesting to think about. The human brain, how your senses work and why they work that way.

So to go on with the actual quote, "normal is an illusion"... That, I agree with. To take it a little theoretical, an illusion is a false idea of reality. The image that we see is based on our observations trough the senses and the processing of all those signals in the brain. In a lesson filosophy I once saw, I've learned that normal is indeed an illusion because, what you see is not what I see.. even if we look at the same picture for example. Test it! Let a few people look at the same picture en ask to write down, let's say 3 things they see. Then hide the picture and let those people tell what they saw. Look at the picture again, the chance is big someone else saw something you didn't. There are so many things we don't see but things that are actually right in front of us. Weird don't you think?

Normal, what is normal? Can anybody give me a definition of 'normal'? Am I normal, are you?

Normal is what the society tells you to be, wants you to be. Normal is related to a bunch of rules, what you can and can't do. Society expects you to behave the way THEY want you to behave. If you're not acting the way they want you to act, you are abnormal. So, what is abnormal? Anything or anyone that does not meet the standards? With all the rules? People with disabilities, abnormal? Homosexuals, abnormal? Eatingdisorder, abnormal? Fat people, abnormal? Gypsy, not normal? So, if you agree to all of that, you can say your grandmother is abnormal too. Why? She doesn't has a job, is not fit anymore, forgets alot, doesn't hear or see good,... Great! If you think that way, click my page away, please. I can not stand people who think that way, people who can not think out of the box. Like my mother said, in stead of thinking outside the box, get rid of the box! Stop putting labels on people. Nobody is actually abnormal because everything and everyone has his or her reasons for living the way they do. Even if they do not know why at the moment, once they will.

A lot of people try to match the standard. They are scared to be who they are, afraid to lose their friends, but what kinda friends you have if they do not accept you for who you are? Well, those people are not friends. I am going to say something that is hard : 'being youself is like a taboo'... When you walk down the street and see someone with blue hair, a lether jacket, boots with spikes on it, what would you think? What's the first thing that comes in to your mind? I know what it is for most people: omg, check this guy.. he's so weird!! Well, no! He is the only one in that street being himself and dares to be himself. I think creative people, artists are the section of all people that dare to be themselves the most. I don't know if it's really is that way, but that's my opinion for now. And also I think those creative people, artists have the most problems emotionally, searching for themselves. I sometimes think they think they're not "normal" (ahum). Anyway, I love creative people. Lot's of fun and mostly very interesting conversations, very open minded. That's my experience. :)

It's hard I think, to be yourself and don't care what other people think about you. Because everybody judges and gets judged. You can call that normal haha. No, I mean that's the way of life. First impression, a lot of people stick with that and don't even try to get to know the person. I have a lot of respect for those who live their life and don't care what others think of them. I sometimes wonder, does that really exists? That kinda people? If they do, well then respect! You my dear, if you live that way, I'm your biggest fan and I mean that. Straight from the heart! Keep on living your life that way ♥! 

Don't you think it's kinda creepy everybody ( or most people ) want to be 'normal', they all want to act the same way, think the same way,... Fortunately we are not all attracted to the same people(for a relationship), that would be a mess haha. That means we are all different and different is normal. That's a prove we are not the same and we don't need to be all the same. 

Kisses!

" Men wouldn't look at me when I was skinny "...

Advertisment for gaining weight! How funny is that? 

Have you ever heard someone say that? I would directly turn around and hear the rest of the conversation! Now, ok, it's a picture from .. well a long time ago! Haha. Oh well, I just adore it. Nowadays if you turn your tv on, computer, magazine, go outside EVERYWHERE, those skeletons are just everywhere. It's like a fucking invasion !! Damn. 

If someone reads this, a publicity maker for example, please use some realistic women for your advertisment.

So, what's not to love about this girl? Actually, I think she's hot! Or maybe it's just because I love pin up style... Hmm but if you think of it, pin up style aren't the most skinniest girls either. So yea, I like the way she looks. Omg, this is so contrary to my last post haha. 'The inner beauty'. 

Ahaha, but I still think beauty is in the inside doh! But I don't know the girl and never gonna met her, and actually, I'm defending myself for giving a compliment? I am so weird.

Sooooo where was I . Oh yea, use normal bodies for advertising in stead of the ideal, giving women the idea they have to look that way, be that skinny. I hope a lot of you know that most of the skinny people in commercials are photoshopped? Really, almost nothing in some pictures are natural. So,why even try? Be yourself and be happy about it! 

Except if you look that way, do not be happy about that! Go home and buy a fitting bra and a t-shirt please! Everybody can be pretty, al least try? Haha







Now, if I may... I would like to go into your personal life. Haha, just messing with you. But hey, nothing against skinny people aight, understand? But what do you grab while having sex ? Don't get me wrong, still don't have anything against skinny people, remember, inner beauty right?! Haha, a lot of girls think they have to be skinny to find a boyfriend but I think men like a bit of 'fat', curves, like I said something to grab. Not only when having sex haha, that was to direct I guess. 

For example, when I hug someone, I don't really like it to feel my own body when I'm hugging the person. I like to hug someone, not some kinda stick. Personal nice warm hugs. 

So you know what to do know, hug on! :D haha. But in the picture you can see what I mean, when you hug someone, I like the feeling I'm not just hugging myself. It's just not nice feeling you own shoulders when hugging someone.  Just my opinion. 
































That's all I wanted to tell you guys for now, to end our or, no my conversation I'd like to share some beautifull pictures! :)

So, you know what to do right? Eat much, gain weight, make you have something to grab haha! No, just be happy about yourself! ♥

Inner beauty and stuff ...

So, today I want to tell you al why I started blogging! 

First of all, blogging is anonymous. Well, I blog anonymous. A pro about that is that I don't get judged. At least not for how I look. The difference with blogging anonymous and having a Facebook page for example, you can put whatever you want without thinking : 'oh no, if he/she reads that, the other one is gonna be mad'.. or situations like that. Here, you don't have a clue what others think of you. And that's a big pro if you want to be yourself for once in a while. 

Because, if you think of it.. how much do you judge people just by the way they look? If you see a person walking down the street, who is in your opinion not that 'beautiful', how big is the chance you'll ever say something to that person? There is a chance this person is amazing! But you'll never know because you already judged them for how they look. And that is what I like about blogging. No need to worry someone is gonna find out who you are! People get to know eachother by their inner thoughts. That's something that happens to few! 

Like I said, how many people that you where not attracted to, you've met in your life? Think about it!




















Have you ever felt that way? You see someone but you don't dare to speak to them because you think they are way more beautiful than you? I guess everybody had felt that way once. But what are we scared of? Being judged by how we look? When you like or love somebody, you take the look for what it is. Don't know for you guys, but I won't feel happy with a guy that looks like a model but is as stupid as the back of a cow. Haha, for the girls who only date guys that look pretty and for the boys who only date girls for their looks, well... Have a great search for love! Because that is just not the way to find it!

Jup! -->

That's a good start! When you feel good about yourself, when you have a good self-esteem you will 'shine bright like a diamond' haha. 

When you feel good about yourself, others are gonna notice. When you can love yourself the way you are and be happy about it, you will be more attractive! And I believe that's for sure. Confidence people just look better! In the way they talk, they walk, and lots more! Really, try it out! Give your self-esteem a boost! You'll see, people will look at you and want to get to know you! 














Look at the woman in the clip down below. Watch it, really. You will feel very different about yourself. She's so right about everything she says.

I watched it and I burst in to tears. All the things she says, I have the same opinion, even before I heard her speak. But coming from her, damn! Respect, don't you think?

So, to go back where I started in this post. 'If the whole world was blind,...' I compare it to anonymous blogging. You guys don't see me and I don't see you. I'm  kinda preaching here about inner beauty, I know. Sorry for that haha. I just think I'm right haha. Blogging for me is kinda freedom. It's like switching a button in my head. But I can hear you guys think, yea yea, but how do you do all of this shit? 

It's all about daring, let yourself go and realize, blog = freedom, dare to do it in real life. ;)
















And last but not least :

It's all about how others see you! Ask a few people that really love you, why do you love me, or like me? Nobody will say, it's because you look really hot! Haha It's because the way you think, and how you think. The things you say and why you say this things. It's about how you live your life and handle the bad things that happen. It's for the way you make them smile, how you make them smile. It's because they love you for who you are, and that my dear friends, those are the kind of people you need in your life. Not the backstabbing losers. Not the kind of people who don't appreciate you. Fuck them! You really don't need them, they only bring you down. You need people in your life that bring you to your highest level! To the best of you!

Soooo, that was my preach for today haha!

See you guys later!